Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Am I A Ho If I Accept Money From A Man?

This Haitian guy at my job always had an eye for me since I have been working there. He's about 50+ years and his name is Julian. He's cool but he would be begging for my cell phone number which I don't have. I told him I would give him my house number, but because he knew I was married he would always decline and ask for the cell. Ha! Apparently his intentions with me were unpure, lol. I would always asked did he have a wife and he said no. Months later after he saw I wasn't giving in, he pulled out of his wallet a picture of his wife and son who are in Hati. WHAT?! So you ARE married! I hate that!!! Why did you deny your wife and child? Oh, Julian can barely speak english. His favorite phrase is, "what you say?" or "humph". I fussed at him and when I did, it was like water on a duck's back. He didn't care.
Julian and I were cool after that. I would sometimes share my food or drink with him. He loves eating my roasted peanuts. Sometimes I would have small talk with him. Had to be small because he knew very few words, but our body language did most of the communicating. Not to long ago he asked me in his best english to teach him english. I was touched! Awww! I would have loved too, but I didn't have the time. I felt bad, but he understood. I even gave him a big hug. He told me that he will be moving his family to NY and go back to school. Julian kept saying how I was nice to him at work. I thought nothing of it, I was just being me.
So last week when we went on break, Julian was standing near the bathroom. We spoke like always and he held his hand out to slap my hand (you know kinda like a hi-five but it was side ways). I smacked his hand back and in the process Julian released some paper in my hand. I didn't know what it was until I looked and it was money. WHAT THE HECK?!!? ARE YOU SERIOUS!?!? Talk about mixed emotions and confused! He smiled at me and said, "for you". I was trying to see how much but how it was folded unable me and I didn't want anyone to see either because I was trying to be discreet. I kept telling Julian, "no, no, I'm ok, no, no, that was nice, but no.!" He asked if I was sure. Honestly, I could used it for gas. We are going through hard times right now. Asking money from my husband is like pulling teeth. Anyway, I politely turned down the offer and was in disbelief that happen to me. OMG, does he think I'm a ho, whore, slut, prostitute?
I later was looking for Peter, from Cameroon, my buddy at the job and my go-to guy. I told him everything. He fell out laughing in disbelief. Guys, I was insulted big time! I was humiliated too! In between laughs, Peter said that if it's a good amount then that's a good thing, but just politely turn Julian down and let him know that I'm not that kind of girl. Peter just kept laughing and then when he finally got himself together he asked, "how much did he give you?" "I didn't know Peter cuz I didn't get to look at it." Peter kept saying how I should have looked to see the amount. He said that if Julian gave me a $100 then that was a good amount and a compliment, but if he gave less then that then it's an insult. Peter kept urging me that I should have found out. After a while, I wanted to know too. A lady like me who likes style and bling would probably pull in a pretty penny, right? I told Peter (he's also a supervisor) I was leaving the line to talk to Julian.

So I went to 'get some water' and I knew Julian would be coming in that area. He saw me and smiled and I thanked him again, and asked him how much was he giving me and why/for what? Julian said it was $10. A whole $10. I can't even get a refill for my nails, I can't even pay a bill and I can't even treat my kids to a Happy Meal at McDonalds! I wish I could add another "0". He looked me in my eyes and spoke the best english ever. Basically he said that I am always nice, kind, and accepting of him. He said that I was the only one here in the states that befriended him. He went on and said how my kindness and niceness touched him and he considers me as a real friend. Then he said that if there is anything that I may need to let him know and that he would take care of me. Julian said he is well aware of my family, but he kept saying no matter how much money I need, he will try and provide.

Now I feel bad. I thought he was giving me money to have sex with me. You know, his side ho, mistress. This old man was being an uncle or a pop pop to me. He didn't want to do the nasty (I say that with my eyebrow raised...), though I'm sure he'll attempt later.

So I went back to Peter and gave him the verdict. Peter gave me the look, and I said ,"$10". He said in his strong accent, "I will go over dey an punch him in dey face." I laughed and told Peter that it wasn't like that. Julian was thanking me and that was his way of saying he appreciated my friendship. Peter said that was sweet of him. I was feeling hurt and disappointed. $10, that's it?! At least $50! Oh well. Of course I told my hubby and we laughed. I could tell hubby was glad I didn't accept it. I told hubby that I did need gas money the day before and if I still needed it, then I was going to accept it and pay him back later. I could tell my hubby didn't approve, but sometimes you have to put fire under their butts. Guys, I really wasn't going to take it but if it was a $100, then can you say, shopping?
Just kidding!